Breathe In....Breathe Out....Simple....right?
Rat (or Mouse) Patrol 2026..and a little break from politics...
Angel came down from Heaven yesterday
She stayed with me
Just long enough to rescue me-Jimi Hendrix
From my viewpoint, lying on our bed, I thought I saw some movement on the floor. Just over near the bedroom door, I thought I saw something. What was that as my brain hopped between mouse and a large Aussie insect? Yeah, they are huge down here.
I’ve seen people’s cats disappear. Strewth!
Minutes later, it came into view as it scurried across the carpet. It was a bedraggled little mouse. Tina was duly advised, and a note for a trip to Bunnings was added to my To Do list. Maybe it was just passing through? That theory was put to rest over the next few days when Dusty, Tina’s daughter, discovered the little rat in her bedroom. She thought it was cute, but still moved to the spare room to sleep that night. I did not tell her that rodents roam, and she may be visited again.
Surprises are much better than sleep anxiety.
Looking at the shape of her bedroom (pictured), I am sure our friendly little vermin was pleased to be amongst the debris in Dusty’s room.
We listened for a scream.
This week also found me struggling with a sore left hip/back and a somewhat bloated stomach. As I was having trouble sleeping and Tina had passed out early (with the help of an Ambien), I was relaxing on the couch in the lounge room. Our little friendly mouse zoomed past at one point, and I was in no shape to try to corner the little bugger. I yelled at it. “Get off my living room floor, you dirty rat.”
(Note: Is it a mouse or a rat….I don’t know for sure….)
As the evening progressed, I felt increasingly uncomfortable with my health. I walked the 15 steps down the hallway to take the trash outdoors, and I felt a bit out of breath. This was about 9 PM, and I just sat with the feeling for a bit. There was a bit of light-headedness with slight exertion, and breathing was becoming more laboured.
As we do in the 21st century, I sat and googled my symptoms, and nothing popped up. A few things leaned towards heart issues, and since I had had Open Heart Surgery in 2024, I was a little concerned. Now, I walk my 10,000 steps or more almost every day and am fit and healthy. I was wheezing a little bit, so I checked the pollen count, but it was low. Even with hayfever, I had never felt this short of breath.
What the fuck is going on? I still let Tina sleep.
With my family history of heart issues, I decided to check my BP/Pulse for a period of 20 minutes. My readings were:
185/119 Pulse 91
195/113 Pulse 91
187/120 Pulse 85
According to the internet, these readings indicate a hypertensive crisis and require immediate medical attention. So I called my friend Joe, a nurse, and he made me feel better about it and how inaccurate my Blood Pressure device might be. I was not sold on a mechanical fault as I was now feeling anxious and out of puff. He thought a bit more and said maybe I should visit the ER.
Still not sold on going to the ER, I decided to call Nurse On Call, a Victorian Health Service, and they took all my details. They then put me through to the Victorian Ambulance Service, and the wheels were in motion. Guess it was time to wake Tina up from her sleeping-pill-induced coma.
No one wants to hear this next sentence.
“Tina, I am having trouble breathing and think I need to go to the hospital. The paramedics are on their way.”
Even with an Ambien on board, she woke up pretty quick and began to question me and help me out. The phone rang again, and she was told the ambo was on its way with ‘lights and sirens’.
Fortunately, they rocked up about 10 minutes later and did not wake up the street. It was a stealth ambulance. They wired me up to check my heart and took my blood pressure. I told them the story and my health history. They asked me if I had any breathing issues, and I said that at times I used Ventolin when I had hay fever, but I had never struggled for breath like this.
Just before the ‘cure’ was found, the paramedics saw a dog walk into the bedroom. The paramedics cooed at the dog and smiled, and then Tina said, “We don’t have a dog”. The paramedics’ faces were hysterical as they said, “Well, this dog does not belong here.” The front door had been left open, and it had just come in to see what the medical emergency was. Or was it magic?
We were just about to have the decision made to pack me up and deliver me to ER when the idea of me using my puffer was thought of. Tina grabbed that in the bathroom, we hooked it up to a spacer, and I took in 4-5 shots of the puffer. Within 90 seconds, my breathing returned to normal, my blood pressure went back to 120/84, and the panic was over.
Tina picked up the cute, tiny Toy Poodle, saying she wanted to keep it, and wandered out to the street. She found a local man calling out for his dog. Tina returned the little baby to Daddy and came back inside. No dog for Tina, I could hear her breaking inside at the loss of a found puppy.
“I located the owner out on the street calling for his dog. The dog’s name is Angel”, Tina laughed.
We all laughed at that one. I started to sing:
Angel came down from Heaven yesterday
She stayed with me
Just long enough to rescue me
Angels come in all breeds.
Emergency Room visit averted!
Post Script
While parenting and raising a family in Sydney, one of our kids wanted a pet rat. She got two pet rats. I think one was called Basil, even though both were female. After a while, Cadence was bored with the rats, so it was left to me to make them disappear, as no one else wanted to care for them. I took them down to Bicentennial Park and set them free, knowing they would be eaten by something soon. My good friend Brian was aghast that I set vermin free in our local park. We have patched that relationship up with some zombie fish and beer.
At some point later, my now ex-wife decided to get a pet rat. This was a male rat. He had been with us only a couple of days, and my wife had gone out for the night. She asked me to ‘socialise’ with the rat, so I took that chore onboard. After dinner, I watched TV with the rat crawling all over my chest and shoulders, and we socialised. I made cocktails and a cheese platter. Conversation was not happening.
My skin was getting a little itchy, so I put the rodent away. Over the next 30 minutes, my face had swollen up, my eyes were tearing and red, and I looked horrendous. Did some research and found that male rodents tend to cause more allergic reactions than female rodents. I recall showing my wife pictures of my face and saying, “The rat has to go.” She said, “We can put the rat outside.”
I stood my ground that the rat had to go, or I had to go, and in short order, some rat-loving person had adopted the little allergen carrier.
https://open.qobuz.com/playlist/57783272 This is the Qobuz Playlist Link. Really, are you still using Spotify…..Qobuz….much better sound quality and they pay artists better.
The penny may have dropped for you now. The cause of my shortness of breath and wheezing was mouse droppings near where I was sitting on the couch. I had moved the couch earlier and must have gotten a good lungful of rat urine scent, and BOOM.
I wish I had come up with this factoid before the paramedics left, as they thought I was just some idiot who forgot to use my puffer.
He’s gone….click into this 30-second little beauty….he’s gone.
https://youtube.com/clip/Ugkxawey-wrWnSxV829z_r1AAc8qKMnv5joz?si=NXby-FPIWjThl7ce
Or just watch the first 30 seconds below….
Thank you for sharing. I enjoyed reading your story